This is a big call, but if I write it somewhere public then maybe I can stick to it? I am looking for support and encouragement.
I am in recovery for PTSD and had a suicide attempt about 2 months ago. I no longer have those thoughts, but if something triggers me (like any time I socialize or have a flashback) I end up going to unhealthy coping mechs like cutting and ED behaviors. I have so much shame for my mental health since coming back from the hospital. All i want to do is isolate. I don’t want anyone around me to see me in a really bad place. I hate myself so much and people have given me every reason to hate me by the way they treated me. I am hoping the treatment will help me heal this. But my aim, for now, is to not being a product of my environment, trauma or mental health symptoms. I am ending this cycle of pain and am starting with no longer showing/telling/acting out on the pain.
Let’s give each other hope through the healing process <3